10 Things I Never Knew I Would Say

I have heard myself say some pretty crazy things in last few months.  If you're a mom you have probably said some very similar things.  Before I had children I imagined snuggling my little angels and watching them play quietly.  They would be polite and well behaved little people at all times. I had no idea what raising children was really like of course.  I'd seen people in restaurants and at the grocery store with loud, misbehaving children and I swore that when I had children they would never behave that way.  Well, like I said, I had no idea what it was really like to deal with the chaos children bring but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. 






I thought it would be fun to list some of the weird things I've said lately, so here they are (please don't judge me too harshly):

1. Toothbrushes are for teeth, not feet.
2. If you're going to eat that boogie please make sure it's yours first.
3. Please don't color on your cheese.
4. Lollipops are for mouths, not ears.
5. Please make sure you take that dress off your brother before your father gets home.
6.He only ate a little bit of it, I'm sure it won't kill him.
7. Please remember that the baby is a person, not a toy.
8. No toys in your pasta please.
9. Please don't eat things from under the couch cushions.

And by far my favorite...

10. The dog may not wear pants but his privates are still private.

What strange things have your heard yourself say lately?